“Ey up cockers, week two oop North and I’m chuffed to buggery as there’s still now’t that can beat me Nan’s chippie tea.” Yep, as you can tell, I have been forced to revert to the Lancashire lingo on account of being accused of turning posh, even though everyone down South still thinks I sound like Jane Horrocks.
Ah well, no -one ever said life was easy.
Mind you, apparently I have missed quite a bit of excitement while I have been up here, crucially the launch of the “Awards Season”, where the good, the bad and the ugly of the marketing world are forced to blow smoke up each other’s arses.
IPA Effectiveness Awards anyone? Sadly I couldn’t make it. Campaign Big Awards? Unlikely they’ll be able to squeeze me in. DMA Awards? No doubt NFI’d again.
Over at The Drum, meanwhile, we all know they have more awards than there are months in the year but would you believe they actually have no fewer than six in one week in December, on consecutive nights from the 5th to the 9th, with the Drum Awards for Out of Home and the Drum Awards for Experience running on the same night?
Luckily there are far more exciting industry bashes out there…after all, why bother with Best Use of Direct Mail (High Volume) when you can live it up at the World Vodka Awards, “the global awards selecting the very best in all internationally recognised styles of vodka”?
Or how about, instead of sitting through the Best Interconnected OOH Format, why not feast yourself at the Academy of Chocolate Awards; “launched in 2005, the awards seek to identify, recognise and showcase the world’s most talented chocolate producers and finest chocolates”?
And even though the Campaign Big Award for Diversity & Inclusion might be worthy, what could be better than the International Cheese & Dairy Awards, which are celebrating their 125th anniversary this year?
Finally, why sit through the Best Brand Activation as Part of an Integrated Marketing Campaign award when you could live it up with the kings and queens of the food industry at the British Kebab Awards 2022?
Then again, maybe they could do “a Drum” and combine all four awards in one night…where you could feast on vodka, kebabs, chocolate and cheese?
And, to be fair, that might even give “me Nan’s chippie tea” a run for its money…